processing - rainbow bridge

Growing Pains

To myself,

Too to myself?

Unsure of myself.

The value of sharing?

The value of internally processing?

 

Back in Austin.

Back feeling unconfident.

 

Over-thinking

Hypercritical.

Stomach in knots.

 

Over what?

A job?

Responsibility?

 

Isn’t freedom what I wanted?

Isn’t it a blessing just to feel this warm wind on my skin?

Isn’t this a place where you can be your self?

 

Your Self.

What is that?

Who is that?

 

A man.

26.

With a dog.

No girlfriend.

Living with his brother.

 

Impatient.

Distracted.

Scared of commitment.

 

Searching for happiness,

And for love,

And for lust,

And for mystery.

 

At the end of the day, don’t we all just want to feel connected?

Connected to the Earth.

Connected to the Stars.

Connected to each other.

 

And are we already so?

Or is there something we’re missing?

Did we miss the path because it was overgrown and under-maintained?

Are we afraid because it has been so seldom traveled?

 

Or are we on it, unaware, and simply experiencing growing pains?

2 thoughts on “Growing Pains

  1. Thank you for sharing your writing and thoughts! Every time I read something of yours it speaks to me on a deep level. I identify with so much of it. Sometimes I even feel like you’ve taken my scattered feelings and thoughts and put them into beautiful words- words that are poetic and reflective and also somehow completely calming. By the end of you post I felt not only a sense of connection by not being alone, but also acceptance, and that sensation of accepting a piece of myself is absolutely blissful 🙂

    1. Thanks Brooke! I’m very happy to hear your feedback! This is why I write: in the hope that by sharing my own process I can connect with others going through their own inner struggle. I’d love it if you share this post in whatever way you see fit. Thanks again!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *